The Other Chester

I got the news from my girlfriend through text today asking me if I know what happened to Chester Bennington, the frontman of Linkin Park. My first reaction and respond was, "Did he die?". I have no idea why that came across my mind first but whenever people ask me questions like that, I get dramatic. True enough, he committed suicide. Tragic.

We named our son after him. My husband didn't like the idea at first but there were two reasons he submitted to it. First, he chose Scarlett's first name after Scarlett Johansson and we agreed that I will get to name our second child. Second, he is a huge Manchester United fan, I told him the name Chester can be found in Manchester. SOLD. He agreed. Or else, it will be Dylan ("D" stands for me and "lan" stands for him). 

Honestly, I am not affected by how my son will think of himself in the future because of the name. I didn't name him after Chester Bennington because I want him to be a rock star. Just as Allan didn't name Scarlett envisioning her to be a Hollywood bombshell. We just like those names after the person. So no, I am not thinking that my son will follow his footsteps. I am saddened because of there are such creepy things like depression and suicide in this world. Killing some of the most talented but yet mentally disturbed people. I am saddened by his death. The fact that he took his life because he felt so trapped that there is no way out for him. Even his wife and six kids couldn't hold him back. How desperate that must have been. I am sad to know there are many people out there probably just like him, not being able to find a way out and simply end their lives. 

Media wrote that his childhood was rough. I love his music and I try not to dig into his personal life. I don't read about it. I don't need to know. But now that he is dead, I get to know. Sexually abused, traumatized, broken family, drug abuse, all the typical kind of brokenness a lot of the unfortunate children suffer from in this world. Have you any idea the kind of impact we can leave on children that can affect them so badly when they grow up? I don't. But now I do. 

I promise myself to take great care of this little Chester of mine. It makes it all the more precious and meaningful for me with Chester Bennington's death. Although I can't help him and all those like him in the world, at least, with this little one, I can love him, care for him, protect him for now and pray that by God's grace, he will grow up to be emotionally healthy and strong.

Right now, life is like a piece of cake to him. He enjoyed the cake his sister baked yesterday and ate up the whole piece.