Papa

I got a text from my mom last night at 1.07am. She told me my dad passed away and that I call her the next day after seeing the text. I knew this day will come since his health was never in a good condition, but I never expect it to be this sudden. I even asked my friend, Willis, during New Year's Eve, if he could drive me to Johore to visit my dad this summer. He has yet met Chester. Seems like that trip will never happen. Never. 

We booked air tickets and will be flying back tomorrow morning, reaching Singapore around 1ish and flying back to Hong Kong on Monday night after everything is settled. 

Crying is not my thing. I didn't feel like crying and didn't feel like feeling anything today. That was my initial reaction. Then when Allan finished booking the air tickets online, he walked into the room as I changed our bedsheets (preparing clean sheets for my parents-in-law to stay over to help look after the kids) and hugged me with a loud sigh, I sobbed. I sobbed for a little while and then got on with what I had to do. It felt good to let that out and it wasn't too dramatic. I guess being so faraway, feeling something is not as easy as being home with him right now. I am sure a lot of feelings will hit me when I get back seeing his lifeless body in the casket and remembering how we used to be together as a family. 

I am dying to be back to be next to him and say my last good bye. Every minute here feels so long. 

He was with me when I went for the fitting of my dress for our small wedding dinner gathering. 

The family I used to have

He adored Scarlett and how I wished they could have hang out more